Thank You TFA

So I never thought I would say this, but TFA has really prepared me for life. Being in South Korea and teaching students English through the Camp on Campus has allowed me to sit back, reflect on the past two years and really appreciate the training I was given. At the beginning of TFA I was the rebel who refused to do formal assessments. I was never a true believer of the system, I hated giving tests and for some reason it did not sink in until long after institute that I need to know what students got out of my lessons. I hated tracking, and never fully did it, so by TFA standards I was a slacker. Interestingly enough, having a fresh start at teaching here has given me another chance to use the tools that I was given during those ungodly Saturday trainings. Even more surprising is that the methods that are being presented here are game based and more fun, the makings of a cool teacher in the states, but they seem flat out ineffective and I have still not grasped why we have to act and amuse our students instead of teaching them.
I cannot even explain how uncomfortable it makes me to try and attempt this style of teaching. I don't see these as a means to get results. I am frustrated because it feels like there is no drive, that the fuel that runs all corps members to end educational inequality is not compatible with the "Fun English Conversation Teacher" prototype they are building. I feel too stern and rigid, as if the methods that I have seen work in my classroom are boring and too controlled. Even the fact that I demand respect and have a firm grasp on discipline is seen as a negative and is seen as a reflection of my ice queen persona.
However, seeing the two systems, two vastly different approaches, I think that TFA really has it right. By the end of my second lesson I was back to being the teacher that I want to be. I have control, I teach direct objectives and when they perform well I praise the students. In my opinion, teaching should be clean of noise and chaos and students should be motivated by personal growth rather than candy or stickers. I can be flexible, throw in a game or two, but I refuse to lose control and let anything slip past me because I am not being true to myself. I want to have my students attain 80% mastery on their end of year English exams. TFA, thank you, I guess I needed to see the non-example in order to realize what I great asset you really were for building me as a teacher. I may come to find out after my stint in Korea is over that games would have been the better thing to do all along, just as I didn't believe in assessments two years ago.